Hard Work? Just Lucky...or Just Networking?

 

Over the years I have befriended some fairly successful people and nearly every one of them throws the same old adage at me for their success.

"Hard work.  That's how I became successful.  I worked harder than everyone else. If you're competition is working 12 hours a day, you have to work 15!"

But that can't be the only reason.  Seriously?  We all work hard, but in order to be more successful than others, certain things need to happen.  Is it luck?  People resent the idea that luck played any part in their success.  Why?  

"It's insulting for you to say that I was lucky.  I wasn't lucky.  It was my hard work that led to success."

Really? I don't think so... it isn't all about just the hard work. Often it's about who you know and your contacts. And it also depends upon where you're born. I live in a very nice area of Los Angeles and I see my friends setting up their children to be successful by putting them in front of the right people.  It's what you do if you're looking out for your kids.  But how successful would these young people be in a different environment?  How well off would they be if they lived in Gardena, Huntington Park, or Fontana? Hard work or just born in the right area and lucky to have great parents? Maybe all three?

Our nation is oddly divided, but the majority of us are in the same boat.  We aren't ultra rich but many of us wished we were.  We all don't have a great job, but we wish we did.  Many of us are struggling just to survive in a corporate world that rewards those on the top and villifies those on the bottom.  Last year I was at a national training meeting and the president of corporate sales opened the conference with this line, "If you're not first you're last. Nobody cares who comes in second. If you're second then you're a loser...I love me some Ricky Bobby."  So do I, but it's a movie and it's a comedy. It's not reality!

So how do we get to be number one?  How do we climb the corporate ladder?  Is it really hard work?  Yes and no.  If you want to move up quickly start by working hard and finish by kissing some major ass with everybody at the corporate office.  From the people at the front desk to the people sweeping the floors, you need to speak to anyone and everyone that will listen to your story.  Here's five quick tips on how to move up.

•  Be Uber Positive - Corporate people love it when you give positive feedback.  In fact, one question I received during an interview for a management position was, "How do you implement a corporate directive that you don't agree with?"  Initially, I thought to say, "I don't. I call bullshit when I see it." But you can't do that if you want to move up.  If you're a corporate climber, tell the higher ups they're doing the right thing and try to find a silver lining amidst the messaging. 
• Ask For Mentorship - People who are in positions of power, lover to be admired. And if you show deference and ask for career guidance, they will love you for it!  The quickest way to get promoted is to become a "mini-me" of someone in a leadership position.  As long as you produce, you're bound to move up...even if you're a bit of a f#$% up.
• Promote Yourself - I have seen people who aren't very good at their jobs fall upwards because whenever they did do something right, they let everyone know about it.  Early in my career at Cintas, there was one service manager who always had great ideas, but never had great numbers.  So how did he get promoted to GM...self promotion.  Anytime he had an idea, he reached out to the area vice president, and suddenly we were all following his lead.  Even though his performance wasn't great, he was promoted to general manager long before people who were much more deserving.
• Become A Drinking Buddy - I am not a big drinker.  I enjoy beer and wine, but I cannot hang out with people all night and drink.  I have a tendency to fall asleep.  Consequently, I never buddied up to the bar with some of the senior leaders who could consume more alcohol than a hand sanitizer factory.  However, some of my friends discovered if they hung out with the corporate hierarchy, they could leverage those late nights into fast promotions.  Belly up to the bar, and you might be hungover but you can still climb over a few sober people to get that promotion!
• Suck Up, Suck Up, Move Up - In 6 years, I saw someone go from an intern to regional manager at a major healthcare company, and he hadn't yet turned 30.  How?  He basically sucked up to everyone in the corporate offices who could influence his career.  He only had one good year, just one, but because he was kissing everyone's butt, when a promotion came up, he was on the short list.  Keep in mind, he wasn't ready for a leadership role, but he got it because he networked with marketing, contracting, R&D, and anyone who would listen.  No one is going to promote you, if they don't know you, no matter how hard you work.

These tips are not a guarantee of success, but they'll help put you in a better position for that next step in your career.  

-SFTD

5 Signs Your Boss Should Not Be Trusted

Throughout my career, I have had many wonderful bosses.  People who mentored me, and showed me what it's like to be supportive and yet firm.  They motivated people, and help foster many careers.  However there have been a few times where I have had terrible bosses.  People who weren't ready to lead and who tried to control each aspect of your professional life.  Managers who were inexperienced but thought they could bullshit there way through every day and get promoted again in the process.  Most of them failed and inevitably got demoted or fired.  However in many instances they're still out there managing and screwing up people's lives. 

A recent study from the Harvard Kennedy School, outlines traits that make a good manager and being vocal, outspoken, and wanting to be in charge are not traits which are suited to the role.  In fact, the study emphasizes having good interpersonal skills and making people feel psychologically safe, while having analytical abilities as well are what makes a manager successful.  Often those two skills cannot be found in the same person, but you can develop into a good manager, through understanding and practice. 

I have had too many managers who self promoted themselves into a position which they were not ready for, and they "learned by doing", but in the process they destroyed careers and ruined lives.  These individuals launched PR campaigns within the organization and secured managerial roles which other people were much better suited to fulfill. 

It's sad but there is a lot of professional fallout from allowing people to "suck up and move up".  In one case, I saw a general manager burn through 16 of his managers before someone pointed out he might be the problem and subsequently he was fired.  And yet those managers the company let go were never invited to return to their old jobs. Essentially their careers with that corporation were derailed by one individual riding a public relations train straight into a sea of inefficiency. 

I trusted all of my managers to start, but as we worked together, little signs would crop up that would tell me some of them weren't to be trusted.  Invariably, they would reveal their true intentions and I would be forced to navigate through the miasma from a fetid work environment they created.  Be on the look out if your manager starts showing these signs, because not only do they stink as leaders, they "sit on a throne of lies."

5. They Can't Admit When They're Wrong - Working with different people over a 20 year career, my former bosses came in many different types. Whenever I work with someone who can't admit to making a mistake, I am immediately put on alert. Once, I was in a meeting and pointed out to my general manager he might have made an error in forecasting and following the meeting he called me into his office and said, "I don't make mistakes. Don't ever call me out again." If your boss can't admit they make mistakes chances are if they do make one, you're going to get blamed. Gaslighting takes on many forms in the corporate world.

4. They Trash Talk Your Fellow Employees - I began working with a new boss and she immediately asked me for my opinion about another employee.  Because I had management experience, she thought it was okay to open up and share. She asked, "well what would you do?"  I answered honestly, "I don't know exactly what's going on with this person, but maybe you should talk to her first?" She said, "The time for talk is over." In six months, that employee's career was over.  I started looking for a new gig shortly thereafter.

3. They Stir The Pot- I partnered with one manager who thought he was a college football coach.  He would tell us that he wanted to "stir the pot to make the environment more competitive." In meetings he would pit employees against each other, and in private he would make comments.  "Why can't you be more like Martha.  She's got my back.  Why don't you?"  I wanted to respond, "Because you're an idiot?"  But instead, I just transferred to another division in the company, working with a boss who had an IQ above 80.

2. "They Have Ulterior Motives" - Have you ever had a boss you worked for that you wondered why they were helping you?  Some bosses just do things so they can look good even though it seems like they're trying to help you.  They always have some type ulterior motive to what they do and it's mostly to make themselves look good.  For example, I had a boss who asked me to create a new way of processing our service sales people during check in and he told everyone what a great job I was doing. Yet after I had perfected the process and documented it, he took all the credit.  I thought I was going to be promoted, but instead I got shafted.    

1. "They Create A 'Game Of Thrones' Work Environment" - Once, I worked for a boss who was eerily similar to the character Littlefinger in "Game of Thrones".  He had spies everywhere and during our one on one meetings he would tell me what his little birds had discovered about me.  

"I understand you think I made a mistake in this year's projections?"

"I never said that."

"That's not what I heard."

"What did you hear exactly?'

"Benny told me during your service meeting that you said my projections were off."

"No. I said I wasn't here during the projection process so I can't say how they arrived at the numbers. And I also said we need to hit our goals regardless. They are set high for a reason."

"Well it came across to the team that you said I was wrong."

"By the team do you mean Benny?  Who already resents me for being in this position?"

"Yes he and Fred think you're undermining me."

" Well let's bring them in and settle this so we can move forward.  I don't want there to be a perception I am not supportive of everything we're trying to achieve. I have your back."

" Bring them in? Why? So you can yell at them? And twist things around?"

" When have I ever yelled at anybody? Twist things around?", I actually laughed. "I thought you brought me here because you said I'm direct, and I don't lie."

" I never said that. I don't know if I feel comfortable with you saying that."

" You're right and now I don't feel comfortable either.  Instead of listening to your little minions you might want to start listening to the rest of the staff.  Ask anyone out there besides those two individuals if I am undermining you and if they think I'm not a team player. If anyone else says so, I'll gladly transfer."

" I'll do that, and I'll hold you to that."

I already knew we were making progress as a team, and I loved the efforts of everyone, including the minions.  But we were not going to be successful in an environment where people were stabbing each other in the back.  My boss asked around and discovered that the rest of the team thought I was not only supportive of him, but that they were grateful I had come aboard. 

Unfortunately this made things worse because now he became extremely insecure.  The environment festered and was intolerable, so I left. 

All relationships start with trust and if you can't trust your boss than it's best to find one you can trust.

-SFTD

Remember...Family Always Comes First

Photo courtesy of 123rf

This post is for people who have a family, and by family it could be kids, uncles, pets, or anyone you consider to be part of your life in a familial way.

When you have a family, it is always difficult to achieve some sort of "work life balance".  By the way, I have no idea what that means, because work always tends to take away from family, so I'm not sure there's really any balance.  In fact, I would argue 95% of people working have an imbalance and those who don't probably aren't working.  Or at least not working in the conventional sense.  Regardless, there are always managers who want you to devote your entire life to the company...even in death.  Read on and you'll see what I mean.

My wife related a story to me about a horrible experience with a regional manager for a diabetes pump company, who appeared devoid of compassion or feelings with regards to business.  Keep in mind, there are considerable number of these managers out there, ruining the lives of their employees because they want to get ahead.  It's pretty pathetic, and tragic as well.

About 10 years ago, my wife's mother passed away and she had been grieving for about two weeks. Naturally, she was compelled to cancel all her speaking engagements, because she was depressed about losing her mom. She called the company's regional sales manager, who had set up the engagement, and was surprised by the reaction. I have paraphrased the phone conversation but it went something like this:

"Hello_______. Unfortunately,  I'm calling to let you know that I don't think I'll be able to make my speaking engagement at the end of this month.  I'm so sorry that I can't make it. My mother recently passed away and I feel I need to be home to help my family through this difficult time."

"Oh really?  I'm so sorry, when did she pass away?"

"Uh...About two weeks ago.  My family is still grieving. And I think I need to be here for my father and the rest of the family.  I'm sure you understand."

"Two weeks ago?  The conference is in 3 weeks.  You don't think you'll be over it by then? You see we don't have a back up speaker for this conference."

My wife almost dropped the phone, "Excuse me.  I must not have heard you correctly.  Did you say, don't you think you'll be over it? Over it?  You do realize my mother died.  You're not serious?"

"Oh right, right. I'm just concerned we don't have a speaker to replace you, and this puts us in a bind. Can you recommend anyone?"

"I have to say, I'm still a bit shocked by your lack of compassion.  Have you ever lost a parent?"

"No. No I haven't. But I did lose my grandmother last year, and I understand it takes a bit of time. But that'll be five weeks, are you sure you can't make it?  I'm in a bit of a bind here."

At this point my wife lost her composure. "I can't believe what I'm hearing!  I did say my mother died.  Did you hear that part? And no, I don't think I'll be able to MAKE  IT! And I won't be recommending anyone or speaking for your company ever again.  Unbelievable! Goodbye."

"Wait I didn't...."

My wife hung up the phone and threw it into the couch cushions.  It immediately started ringing again, she picked it up, looked at it.  Dropped it and began sobbing.  Through her tears she mumbled.

"Family always comes first...always. How could she not know that? How could she not care?"

My response, "Some people are selfish."

Her response, "Some people are assholes."

Touche...


SFTD