Your Boss's Untimely Emails

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It's Sunday night and I just had a friend stand up to leave the restaurant where we were enjoying a great meal and watching the Cubs play the Red Sox.  If you don't know who those teams are then you are not a baseball fan, but it was a good game!  She was so upset that she literally shot up out of her chair and stood to leave because she was pissed off by an email she received from her boss at 6:30 pm.  My wife stood up too.

"Where are you going?  The game is only in the 4th inning?"

"I just got an email from my boss I need to respond to."

"Why the hell are you checking your emails on a Sunday night?"

Our friend responded, "Because my phone was vibrating so I saw the email and clicked on it."

My wife was upset because our friend was upset but she put the onus on her, "Why did you read it?"

I thought the opposite, "Why the hell did he send it on a Sunday night?"

"Right?!" was our friends respond and she added, "It's the weekend.  Why would you email a field ride review on a Sunday night? Especially one that has negative comments.  That son of a bitch!"

I had to agree.  Apparently this manager sent her a field ride evaluation and he couldn't help but send it on a Sunday night.  Why?  To ruin the employee's weekend?  To be a jerk?  To show the employee that she needed improvement in areas and put her in a situation where she could do nothing to improve the situation except get upset?

I have to agree, her boss is a jerk.  Maybe not intentionally, but sending a negative email to someone on a weekend, when neither one of you SHOULD be working, is a bad move.  First of all, it's the weekend!  Secondly, we are all synced to our email and phones, and invariably we check emails all the time. He had to know she would check her email that night and he sent the evaluation anyway. WTF?!

I have devoted my career to teaching managers how to not be complete dickheads and get the most out of their people. However, there is that one person in every class who doesn't listen but rather REFUSES to listen.  That one person who gets pissed off and fights against being somewhat nice to employees, because they think that there is an intrinsic reason they are now the boss.  That one person who sends twitter posts that read "only the strong survive", or "the best...lead the rest".

That person is an idiot.  And if you send an email to your employees on a Sunday and the email  doesn't  have a positive message... you're an idiot.

SFTD

Is Your Company Worth Dying For?

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Recently, I came down with a terrible case of the flu.  In fact, it was so bad I was nearly hospitalized and stayed in bed for days.  I never stay in bed.  In fact, I hate staying in bed. So while I stayed in bed, my wife took care of me, but I could sense she was trying to avoid getting sick as well.  I knew she had a conference she had to attend in the next few days so she was literally placing food and supplies outside my door like a guard dropping off meals for a prisoner. She would then open the door, slide the food in, and close the door. It's lonely when you're in solitary confinement.

However, I understood why she was reluctant to interact, because she had never seen me this ill.  In fact, I don't think I had ever been quite so ill in my entire life.  Moreover, she had a conference to attend and would be speaking so she didn't want to miss the opportunity.  However as the days passed, she started to cough more, and eventually she contracted the same flu virus as myself.  She called the company she was working with and notified them she couldn't attend.  What was their response to her 103 degree fever and her doctor's notice?

"We need you here whether you're sick or not, you need to attend.", this came from the event coordinator.

"Surely you're joking. Why would I come if I'm sick?  I'll just get everyone else sick.  We work in the medical field, do you know how bad that sounds?", she replied, more than a bit shocked at the coordinator's lack of empathy.

"I know it sounds bad, but it looks worse that you're one of our key speakers and you're not going to show up because of a little flu."

My wife's patience had run out and I'm sure her fever wasn't helping, "A little flu! A little flu! You call a 103.4 degree fever a little flu?  That is absurd.  I have a signed note from my doctor stating he doesn't want me to fly.  What do you propose I do?"

"We are all sick. Just take some Day-Quil and get on a plane like everyone else.", apparently the event coordinator did not have a degree in bed side manners.

My wife fumed, "What?! I'm in complete shock.  Not from the fever, but from your apparent candor or should I say lack of understanding.  I'm sorry but I am in no condition to fly and despite my obligation to the company, I'm staying home.  You'll have to find someone else to fill in for me."

"Well if you're not going to come than I will speak to our management team about your relationship with the company and if we want to continue as partners."

"You don't have to do that.  I understand that this puts the company in a bind and I'm sorry, but I'm sick and there's nothing more to be said. I'm not willing to risk my health or that of others so best of luck at your meeting."

"So you're not coming? This is bad."

"No I'm not coming. I think I made that clear, and bad or not I will definitely be making some calls of my own.  Good luck with your meeting.  I need to get some rest now."

"Wait.  So what should I do?"

"Maybe you should call one of your speakers who isn't sick. I'm going to get some rest like my doctor told me.  Good bye."

I was amazed that she didn't throw her cell phone to the ground.  I rarely see my wife angry, but she was sick and now she was fuming.

"What the hell do they expect me to do?  Die for their stupid company?  I'm not even an employee!  I can't imagine how they treat their employees.  That was ridiculous. I'm never speaking for them again.  In fact, I'm not sure I'm going to use any of their devices ever again."

I thought long and hard about what she said, and in some cases companies do expect there employees to come in sick, to work through pain, and for what?  Nothing really, except to show their work ethic and loyalty to the company.

However you have to wonder if that loyalty is ever returned...think of the loyalty a company would earn if it was reciprocated.  A little empathy goes a long way, but a lack of empathy can sever even the best of relationships.

-SFTD

Big Data...or Big Mistake

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My wife has worked in the medical field for over 15 years.  She has cultivated relationships with people, including many sales reps and she has established friends over the years.  When I came home from work the other day she was distraught.

"Apparently I'm losing my clinical dietitian Jamie with _____ company because they're changing territories."

My response was simply, "Why?"

"She said they brought in some big data analysis company who realigned all the territories according to some stupid algorithm."

I asked, "I wonder if the algorithm took your relationship with Jamie into account."

"Apparently not, and if I don't get a good dietitian, I'm dropping them as my pump company. I won't make recommendations for them anymore.  And I won't speak for them either."

I sensed she was being a bit over dramatic but she did have a long relationship with this particular dietitian, who was exceptional.  And as is mainly the case in my house, I put my foot in my mouth.

"It can't be that hard to find a good clinical dietitian.  Is it?"

"Are you kidding me!  There's been times where I haven't been available or we were on vacation and Jamie literally saved our patients lives with some of her recommendations. You've even met Jamie a few times. How dare you!"

I apologized immediately for my ignorance. Mind you, I don't know that much about dietitians but apparently the job is not just recommending what type of food a patient should eat.  And so my wife explained that these people go to school for at least 6 years, have training yearly, and a good dietitian, especially a renal or diabetes educated one, can make a huge difference in a patients life.

I guess saving patients lives or influencing them didn't factor into the company's algorithm either.  I know that there are a lot of people to help support patients and their maladies, but you never know how much of an impact changing a sales territory can affect people's lives.  At least not until it affects you.

I'm not so sure it's a good idea to crunch numbers when you're impacting peoples lives.  I know that statistics are not supposed to lie, but there is no way to measure the ability of a good sales rep, great dietitian, or even a relationship, and factor it into an algorithm.  I'm sure that people are taking those considerations into account when mapping out territories, aren't they? Wrong!  Wake up CEO's.  Not everything can be reduced to a number.

I still have many friends working in medical sales, so I called one of them who is a regional manager, because I knew he was going through exactly the same situation with his company.   They had discussed adding a few reps, and the company had sought his advice on where to "carve out" a territory in his region. They gave him maps, and accounts, and he spent weeks trying to figure out how to spread out the accounts, in order to minimize the damage of a change.  Why would there be "damage" you might be asking yourself?  The answer is simple. Customers do not like change.

Once he did all this calculating and reworking of his territories, would you like to know what the company did?  They ignored all of his hard work and just arbitrarily made changes based upon some recommendations they received from a consulting company.  A consulting company whom supposedly based their decisions upon geography, account leads, and revenue.  He showed me the data because I was a math and economics major in college and I told him exactly my thoughts. But it didn't take a math wiz to figure out the problem with the territory break down.

"You have 3 large territories and one tiny one.  That makes no sense.  How did they come up with this algorithm? What did they factor in?"

"Beats me!  Current revenue maybe? But this little territory won't support a rep! There aren't enough prospective new customers, just a few current ones.", he said and he pointed to a tiny map in the middle of two large territories.

"Why is it so small?", I asked. "Is it just a few large accounts?"

"Bingo!  They figure if just one rep focuses on these 3 accounts they can maintain the territory."

"That sounds reasonable.  What happens if they happen to lose one of the accounts?", I asked.

"Uh, they're fired?"

"That sounds promising for a new rep.  Is there a contingency plan if something happens?"

"Uh, they're fired...and I'm fired?"

"It sounds like that consulting company and their big data algorithm figured it all out for you."

"Gee thanks for the support?  Anymore good advice."

"Don't lose any of those accounts."

"You're brilliant!", he said with a mouth full or sarcasm.

"I know.", I answered with a wry smile and a laugh.

Yet I felt sorry for him, knowing full well that if the company had listened to his advice, he might have full control over his future and that of his reps.  Sometimes big data can make some big mistakes, or set you up for some big failures.  I believe it's best to use data but to also work with your people to come up with a plan that will make everyone successful.

But what do I know, I'm just a consultant...

SFTD

Contest Schmontest...Create A Movement

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Organizations are always offering contests.  When I was a manager, whenever we needed to pick up sales or revenue, we would create a contest to get the ball rolling.  There is nothing like a good contest to get people involved, excite employees, and offer great prizes as a result.  Right? I say contest schmontest, you need to create a movement.  A contest is something you run for a month, but a movement can cover a whole year!  Contests come and go but movements may go on forever...depending on how committed the company is to the movement.

To start a contest you must contact the sales team, or service sales team, but to establish a movement you need EVERYONE in the organization to change their way of thinking about contests, and you need to get EVERYONE involved.  Not just the service or sales teams. Sure a contest can help your sales increase for a quarter, but what if revenues increased the whole fiscal year.  Now that would be an accomplishment.  

Right now you are asking yourself, "how the heck do I get the whole organization involved in a movement? That's impossible!"

Wrong.  It's not as difficult as you might think. You simply have to get all of the factions of your business working together.  Success in business is about people, and getting them to work together towards a common goal. If you can do that, your company is bound to be successful  However, in order to create a movement you have to do a lot more planning. Below I've listed a few key components that you need if you want to create a successful movement in your organization.

1. Omnipresent Awareness - When you have a contest, the people who stand to benefit the most are usually the only ones focused on the results.  Subsequently, all the people supporting those sales or service people are alienated.  In fact, they might even be a bit resentful that they aren't being included.  In order to effectively infuse your whole organization with a movement, ALL YOUR EMPLOYEES, need to be aware of your goal and how they can help the organization over achieve.  Do you think Zappos got to be so big because Tony Hsieh created a contest?  Heck no.  He changed the entire dynamic of the company.  Make sure that there are visible markers everywhere your employees can see them, and that your progress towards a goal(s) is visible.  If you're going to create a movement, it should be shared in the hallway, in the bathroom, in the cubicle, even in the break room refrigerator.  If you walk through your business, everyone should feel it hanging in the air.

2. Monetize Efforts - One year while I was still working at Cintas, we decided to have another sales contest.  Whoop de doo! Another time for service and sales partners to ostracize production people. I was a bit frustrated because if production didn't help support our efforts, then we would all fail miserably.  Our solution was to monetize the efforts of our production people.  They were included in the contest(s) all year and they loved it!  We didn't pay them commissions, but if the sales or service team they were supporting did well, then all of them received a little bonus.  Believe me, we didn't break the bank with payouts, but they felt included which was much more important.  They felt like they were part of something special and that is the whole point of a movement.  Inclusion.

3. Recognize and Reward - Role plays are a normal part of sales training.  Actually, let me rephrase that... they are an annoying part of sales training.  I can remember having to do a role play in front of 300 people, and doing very well, but hating every moment I was in the spotlight.  However, after I finished, the training coordinator came over and said I was too funny and needed to be more focused on the new selling technique. Seriously?  No pat on the back for a good effort, just criticism. I can tell you that I was so demotivated, I didn't even want to participate in the training sessions.  I was done with the "new selling technique". If you want to create a movement, you need to reward and recognize people for making a great effort, even if they aren't perfect.  It's not a participation trophy, it's motivation for the future.  You can't create a movement without participants and the best way to include people is to recognize and reward them.
  
4. Visualize The Goal - People learn in many different ways.  In fact, there are 7 different ways to learn and process information.  However, I have found that with the advancement in technology that people are extremely visual nowadays. Therefore if you want to create a movement, you have to visualize your goal(s).  For example, have you ever walked into a work place and saw that board which reads "___ days without a lost time accident".  This is an example of visually making people aware of a goal.  Why not create a sign that reads, "___ days of continual process improvement", or "___ days of increased sales revenue".  Why do we focus on accidents in order to visualize our goals?  Why don't we visualize all of our goals? If people see, then they can start to believe.

5. Little People Need Love - I listed this last, because it seems that the little people who help support company efforts are always the ones who are last to benefit, if they benefit at all.  Despite the fact that they make the products, or provide the service, they seem to be lost whenever it comes to recognition.  Often they receive no love from the "C suite", which is a travesty.  In many of the companies I've worked with, once they understand the importance of their "little people", they are able to include those employees in their movements and garner even more success.  The thousands of employees who help support organizations are a powerful force and united they can help build pyramids, but if ignored they can help tear them down as well.  You have to include even the little people if you want a successful movement.


The next time someone suggests you have a contest, tell them that's "old school".  You want to make an impact on your top and bottom lines...create a movement.  You'll be glad you did.

SFTD

Are You Neglecting Your Best People?

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Yesterday, I rode with a sales rep who had finished in the top 1% or her company the last 3 years.  I'd say that's a pretty good rep, wouldn't you? I thought I'd pick her brain about what she was doing in the field to facilitate her sales, or what she liked about the company culture, or could she offer me any advice to help other reps.  Do you want to know what we talked about for the first 2 hours? We talked about another rep, who is in the same region, who gets much more attention because she's a "problem child".

Guess what?  I wasn't shocked.  I see this all that time, and with every company I've worked with.  It's a big issue, especially for management.  Companies are neglecting their best people...in every industry.  Why?

Reactive Management - The truth is that managers pay more attention to their problem children than their best employees.  It's a natural tendency. I remember as a kid, my parents would pay much more attention to my brother, who was always in trouble.  The other 4 kids, including myself, resented the preferential treatment.  He was sent to a psychologist, and different specialists because he was "yearning for attention as a middle child".  Which was exactly what he got, and lots of it, which in turn reinforced his behavior! I was just six years old, and even I could see what he was doing...he even admitted when we were older he knew exactly what he was doing and why.  He felt special.

The same scenario applies to employees.  Managers must not be reactive, but instead proactive. If you are a manager and you have an employee who is taking up most of your time, you should let that employee know right away, that you have other people working with you who are in need of help as well.  Don't let a troublemaker monopolize all of your time, because if you do,  I guarantee the other employees will feel neglected and harbor resentment towards both you and the employee. Nip it in the bud.

Survey Junkies - If I hear about one more stupid company survey result I'm going to vomit.  They're not accurate!  Why?  Because people are afraid to be honest in those surveys.  When I was in an Advisory Board meeting at one such company, they asked me what I thought of the surveys and my answer was simply, "They're bullshit.".  Which elicited quite a response, with lots of murmuring and comments.

The reasons many surveys don't work is because despite the good intentions, the beginning questions are sometimes too specific to a person's role in the company and the employees feel like there will be repercussions if they answer honestly.  You may ask, "well why would they feel that way?" Listed below is a series of questions from a survey I reviewed a month ago, and I paraphrased the questions, so I don't reveal the company or the survey.

1. Which division of the company do you work for?
2. What region of the USA do you work in?
3. Are you a regional manager, district manager, or sales rep?
4. What are your focus products in your region?

Those 4 questions alone might narrow the person taking the survey down to a select few individuals within the company, and therefore the expose employee's identity. If I was taking that survey there is no way in hell I would answer honestly, especially if I had negative things to say about my immediate supervisor.  Many people taking surveys feel like they are a form of intrusion rather than the means to a solution.

Out of Sight, Out of Mind - If you're in management, unless someone is either performing wonderfully or performing horribly you really don't notice them.  As a matter of fact, you're probably not even thinking about them at all.  The sales rep I rode with for a day, said that her boss never calls her except to complain about what a pain in the ass the other reps are in her region.  First of all, a manager should NEVER SHARE ISSUES with employees.  In addition, relating personnel issues to an employee is just plain stupid.  People talk...a lot. She told me he was looking for advice on the best way to manage his reps, but if he needs her advice then why isn't she the manager and not him!

If the only time you contact an employee is to let them know they suck or they're great, than as a boss you're simply an absentee manager.  You might as well be like ET and just phone home because that's where you'll be once your employees start leaving...at home without a job.

The Rules of Engagement - I like that the word engagement is the new catch phrase for getting employees involved.  It has a lot of different meanings:

en·gage·ment

inˈɡājmənt,enˈɡājmənt/

noun

noun: engagement; plural noun: engagements

1. 1.

   a formal agreement to get married.

   synonyms:

   marriage contract; More datedbetrothal; archaicespousal "they broke off their engagement"

   • the duration of an agreement to get married.

     "a good long engagement to give you time to be sure"

     
     
2. 2.

   an arrangement to do something or go somewhere at a fixed time.

   "a dinner engagement"

   
   

   synonyms:

   appointment, meeting, arrangement, commitment; More date, assignation, rendezvous; literarytryst "a social engagement"

3. 3.

   the action of engaging or being engaged.

   "Britain's continued engagement in open trading"

   
   
4. 4.

   a fight or battle between armed forces.

   synonyms:

   battle, fight, clash, confrontation, encounter, conflict, skirmish;

An engagement could be a fight or battle or a formal agreement to get married.  Two seemingly opposite ends of the relationship spectrum.  However when engaging employees it is important to know that it's not always about the job.  It is about forming business relationships.  It doesn't mean you have to be married to your job or the people you work with, but it does mean you must foster relationships with people in order for everyone to be successful.  Listed below are a few tips for managers on engagement:

• Be engaged yourself - I remember a long time ago in a business far, far, away, my boss called me in because he wanted to "get to know me".  I sat down in front of his desk and he asked me a series of questions, but not in the normal course of conversation. More like a list that he had to check off.  I felt like I just arrived at Customs in an airport.  He wrote down my wife's name, my families names, where I lived, what I liked to do outside work, but he rarely looked up from his desk.  It offended me rather than made me like him more.  A good manager is engaged themselves.
• Share - The best people I have ever worked with shared their lives with me.  I don't mean I went to their homes, or played with their dogs, but they shared a piece of themselves.  It made the relationship that much stronger, and I'm still friends with many of them to this day.  Don't just view your employees as numbers, but rather as people and if you share with them, they won't see you as just a manager or supervisor.  However if you have some weird and creepy hobby or fetish, please keep that to yourself.
•  Care - 15 years ago, I had been a manager for a few years, and a new management trainee came into my office and shared that he had an aging grandmother with a slew of medical bills. He asked if he could get an advance on his check for $1500.  Well, the company I worked for never gave advances, especially ones for $1500, so I loaned him the money myself.  Everyone thought I was crazy, but I knew he was good for it and it went to a good cause.  He paid me back in 6 month, and he was one of the hardest working and loyal people I had the pleasure to work with.  Just a great person.

I knew that he cared about his grandmother and they made me care even more about him.  People like that aren't a dime a dozen, so you have to do your best to keep them.


I can't guarantee that this post will help you keep all your best people, but I can guarantee that it will make you think twice about neglecting them.  And if you follow some of the tips, it will make them think twice about leaving. 

Have a good day!

SFTD 

You Don't Own Me...

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It's a Friday night and I just received an urgent email from a customer saying they needed to change the outline of our training schedule for the company's team and he needed it done immediately. Please keep in mind the training was to take place next week and the schedule was already set.  I sent an email reply stating it was Friday at 7 pm and I would forward it to him tomorrow morning. What was his response? He sent me a text and then called me...while I was out to dinner with family and friends.  I didn't answer the phone. Instead I sent a text stating I would call him tomorrow.  He sent one back demanding I call him. Are you friggin kidding me? We have a contract but that doesn't mean you own me dude! The reason I ventured out on my own was so I didn't have to deal with assholes like you in the corporate environment.  I am a contractor not an employee! FU!

I excused myself, called him, and asked him why it was so urgent that we resolve the issue tonight.  He explained he was leaving for the weekend and wanted to make the changes now.  He demanded that I drop whatever I was doing and go home to make the changes immediately.  I politely told him no, that he could email the changes he wanted made, and I would do it tomorrow and send the changes to him for approval.  When he threatened to cancel our agreement, I told him that despite his insistence, my personal life and that of my family was more important than any agreement, and if after all the work we had done, he wanted to stop working together over this particular incident then that was fine with me.  I could tell that he was trying to bully me into changing my position but I refused to give in to his demand. 

He yelled into the phone, "This is total bullshit, why are we paying you if you're not available at all times."

I responded, "I never said I was available at all times, but I am available to help if the demand for time is reasonable.  This situation is not reasonable. I am already out with family and friends and I will take care of this tomorrow morning first thing."

"I told you I need this now. What are you going to do about it."

"Well, I'm going to hang up the phone, go back and finish the dinner I was having with my friends and family and work on it when I get home."

"That's not good enough for me."

"Well I'm sorry but it's good enough for me. I don't believe it's unreasonable to wait 12 hours for the changes when it's 8 o'clock on Friday night and the training isn't until next week."

"I told you I need it done now because I'm leaving for the weekend. Are you going to do it?"

"No I'm not."

"Then I'll have to inform the CEO that we are not going to continue with the training."

"That's fine with me.  I'm sorry you feel that way. I'll be sure to call him first thing tomorrow and let him know your decision. Have a good night."

"Wait.  What?  That's it.  You're just go to give up?"

"No. I'm not giving up. You made the decision to stop the training not me.  I'll be sure to let him know."

"It's because you're being unreasonable!", and he shouted this into the phone.

"I'm the one being unreasonable? Think about that?  I'll make the changes you requested first thing and after you've calmed down you can decide if you want to continue with the training."

"Oh no, we're not going to continue.  No way."

"Fine. I'll email the CEO of your decision.  Thanks and have a good weekend.", I said and hung up the phone.  He called me back straight away...9 times.   But I didn't answer. He sent me texts while I sat, ignored them, and enjoyed a nice dinner.  I finally turned the vibration off on my phone because it was getting annoying.  When I finally got home, I checked my voicemail and there were a slew of messages ranging from angry to apologetic.  All recorded for me to pass on to the CEO, if my professional conduct ever came in to question. 

I sat there and thought about what prompted this guy to become so enraged over something so minor, and then I thought about this person's poor employees. They must feel harassed, brow beaten, and down trodden.  No wonder the company needed my help!  I want all of you reading this post to remember one thing, "No one owns you!"  Despite all the work hours you may be putting in, or the attitude of your boss, who calls you every night, you do have the power to make your own decisions and either tell them to stop harassing you, or quit.  However, don't ever feel like you must do everything they ask, or you'll be headed down a slippery slope. 

Once you give in to a business bully, they will run over you time and time again.  Never let people think they own your life from dusk til dawn, because then you won't have any life.  No job or business relationship is worth that type of degradation or humiliation. 

The next day, I received a phone call from the CEO.

"Good morning M.  I got a call from Roger last night saying you were unwilling to make some changes to the schedule for him?  Is that true?"

"That is true.  I was unwilling to make the changes immediately because I was out to dinner with friends who flew into town and my family.  I told him I would make the changes when I got home."

"That's not what he said.  He said you were upset, unprofessional, and you yelled at him about being bothered on a Friday night. "

"Listen, I understand he was frustrated but I never said anything about being bothered, I simply asked him to wait til morning for me to make the changes. I explained that I was out with family and friends and I would address it right after dinner.  If you want to talk about professional conduct I have 6 voicemails from Roger that you might want to hear."

"Really?  Well again that's not what he told me.  He felt you were unprofessional."

"That's fine. Perhaps is was just a miscommunication on my part. But if you want, I can email you the voicemails and you tell me what you think?  I understand that you have to support your employees and that's important.  But I can assure you that I would never conduct myself in any manner as to be offensive.  And again, I apologize for the miscommunication between Roger and me."

" Well.  Yeah, until I hear these emails, let's hold off on our agreement."

" That's fine.  I'll send you the emails right away and we can talk after you've listened to them."

" Sounds good.  Thanks."

I transferred the voicemails to my email and forwarded them to him as soon as I hung up the phone.
I got a call 30 minutes later.

"Hello M.  I want to apologize for Roger.   I can't believe what was said over the phone, and especially about your family and friends.  It was completely unprofessional and I am grateful to you for bringing it to my attention.  It seems we have a real problem here. "

"Well, yes we do.  I'm sure he's a real go getter and all, but you have to consider his conduct. That's what our training is all about.  Engagement... not harassment. "

" I'm just shocked.  Really, really, shocked. "

" So was I.  Good thing I didn't put the voicemail on speaker. My wife would have fallen out of her chair."

He chuckled a bit, "Well Roger and I are going to have a little talk on Monday.  And I'll assign someone else to handle the training."

"Are you sure? "

"Yes I'm sure.  Stop by Monday and we can discuss how to move forward.  I have someone in mind."

" Sure thing.  Thanks for the phone call. "

"No. Thank you for bringing this to my attention."

I hung up the phone, and rather than feeling elated because Roger was about to receive his comeuppance,  I felt sad because here was another yet another example of a manager acting like a jerk.  I've always felt it's been my mission in life, to instruct people on how to be better leaders and now I was not going to get the chance to help Roger.  Life can be cruel.

Every time some one tells you that you need to go the extra mile, and that you need to work weekends, holidays, and whenever they feel you need to work, then simply tell them...

"You don't own me."

Life is more about living, not serving.

-M

How Do You Measure Success?

Copyright: rawpixel / 123RF Stock Photo

Simple Definition of success

• : the fact of getting or achieving wealth, respect, or fame
• : the correct or desired result of an attempt
• : someone or something that is successful : a person or thing that succeeds

Source: Merriam-Webster's Learner's Dictionary

A week ago, I was sitting in a hotel bar, just watching a baseball game, when I overheard a conversation from a few drunken businessmen seated nearby. They were arguing about what were the standards by which someone was successful.  However they were defining success in dollars.  A few numbers came out like ten million, twenty million, and even one hundred million.  One particularly inebriated gentleman very loudly tried to make his point.

"Dude, I wanna be ______ that guy is loaded.  He's gotta be worth a billion dollars. Now that's someone who's made something of his life.  If you look in the dictionary under the word 'success' you'll see his picture. "

And as he said this, he made the notation for quotation marks with his hands.  I don't know about you, but I'm starting to find that annoying...air quotes.  Do we really need to know the grammatical underpinnings of the word you just uttered, or are you doing it for effect?  Either way, I don't like people gesticulating near me, it's dangerous.

 Yet alcohol has a strange way of making people think they're more amusing than they really are, or in some cases more intelligent, but in most instances, it just makes people loud and obnoxious.  I would say he fit into that category, but he was determined to clarify his definition of success.

"What do you make? Maybe 100K a year?  That ain't nothing. I make three times that.  Does that make me successful? " he said and his eyes had this glazed over look.  The others guys in suits were just watching and waiting, almost expectantly for him to fall. He teetered back and forth holding his glass, but he remained standing.

"Damn right it does!", he said and then burst out laughing, after which he immediately drained his drink, slammed the glass on the bar, and ordered another.

"So if you make 300K per year that means you're a success?", asked one of the other suits, a tall blond haired guy with freakishly large hands, and a weird angular head.

"Yep! 300K.  That's the cutoff.!" the drunk shouted.

"What about kids and family and all that stuff?", the guy with the odd shaped head asked.

"What about'em?  You can still have'em.  But you gotta make 300K.", said the inebriated one.

All the other business men were just watching the two of them, as if a fight was about to ensue.  They formed a small semi circle around them and patiently waited for a retort from the man with the big hands.

"So it's all about the money? Nothing else?", he said.

"Yep.  What are you an idiot?! That's ALL life is about is money! I can't help you if you don't realize that by now.", the drunk man responded and waved his hand in front of his face, like he was shooing away a fly.

"I don't agree with that.  You can't define success in terms of just dollars."

"Yes you can!  That's the measure of success.  How much you make?"

The man with the big hands, waved them in front of his face, dismissing the drunkard, "My dad didn't make anything compared to me, but I consider him to be one of the most successful men I've ever known.

"You're an idiot!", the drunk guy responded.  "All people care about is money."

The tall blond guy stood up, "No that's all you care about.  You can't measure a man by his wallet. My dad raised 5 kids by holding down three jobs and all of us went to college, and two of us are in grad school, and my sister is a doctor.  Now that's a success."

All the other suits now looked at the tall man with the big hands with a sense of awe.  Who was this rebel, coming in and throwing water on the fire of the drunken man.  Who was this person throwing a cog in the wheels of their warped American Dream?

"That's impressive...but you're still an idiot. No matter how great you and your parents are, I guarantee that your dad thinks he's a failure."

"No.  You think he's a failure...and you're the idiot.", the tall man said and he just walked off.  The drunk guy called after him.

"F#$k you!", he shouted, but the man with the big hands didn't respond.

"Who was that?", one of the guys asked another.

"No idea.  Just some dude who was hanging out with us."

"I'd say his night was a success.", I said, and raised my glass.  They all laughed...except one.

SFTD