"How Do You Get Hired?"-Interview Tips From A Call Girl

Copyright: prometeus / 123RF Stock Photo

I read a post on LinkedIn two days ago, which covered why people get hired, and it had well over 200,000 views.  I thought to myself,

"Okay this must be a very good post, with some great content, otherwise people wouldn't read it. Right?". WRONG!

Then I looked at the picture associated with the post, which was seductive, and I looked at a picture of the woman who authored the post and then I thought, "She kind of looks like a hooker or a high priced call girl. Men are such pigs!"

And then I had an epiphany, "I can do that too!"

Well, I can't actually be a call girl, I don't have the skill set, but living in Los Angeles I do know people, who know people, who know people...you get the point.  A few well placed texts and phone calls and I had a former call girl on the phone for an "interview"?  She was now a therapist which totally blew my mind, but I guess the professions are similar?  She kept reminding me she wasn't cheap and she didn't have sex with just anyone, but that she needed money when she first got to Los Angeles, and this profession helped to supplement her income. 

As I was speaking to her, I had all kinds of crazy thoughts running through my head, like "Couldn't she recycle cans or something or work at Starbucks for extra money?" But I wasn't going to judge so I asked her one simple question:

"How did you get hired?"

She gave me a whole litany of things that she did to get hired.  How she dressed, where she went, her conversations, etc.  Below is a simple list and advice that applies not only to her but really everybody.  Judge if you must, but these tips are pretty good.  Enjoy!

Use A Recruiter - You can't get a job if you don't have someone promoting your skills.  In her case it was a madam, but in your case it's a recruiter.  When people tell me they can't find a job my first question is, "Do you have a recruiter?".  If you don't have one, then find one, because they are invaluable to your job search and there is one out there for you.  She told me she would have never done this if she didn't have someone setting up her "interviews".

Plan For Your Interview - She advised me that before she even went to meet a person, she solicited feedback from her "recruiter" on what they person was looking for because she wanted to be sure she was hired.  Which was odd to me because I thought call girls were always "hired".  She said that being turned down was very rare, but she advised me that "people with a lot of money are discreet and if they get a bad feeling about you, the interview is over, and you don't get the job."
Sound familiar?

Dress Appropriately - This was some of her best advice, citing that if you're calling on businessmen with a lot of money, they don't want to be seen with someone who looks like a hooker.  So be well dressed and classy, and absolutely no spray tan.  "It makes you look fake and cheap". Often these type of men just want to be seen with someone who looks good and conducts themselves well.  If you're going to an interview don't dress like your spending a night on the town in Vegas, or you just came from a strip club.  Dress professional.

Be Prepared - Again, great advice, and again I was amazed by her response.  She really put a lot of thought into meeting her clients, and perhaps this is why she charged so much.  She recommended that you plan well ahead to make sure that the interview goes well and doesn't take a bad turn.  Also research your client or company and get some feedback from people on how it is working with them.  For her it meant calling other girls in the business, or her recruiter, and for you it's the same.  Contact employees, check on job boards, message boards, or anything that will give you feedback on the company or hiring manager.  Recruiters again, will do all this for you.

Relax; Be Yourself - She admitted that this is the hardest thing to do, because no matter how well prepared you are, if a client senses you're nervous and jumbling your words, then you're not going to be hired.  How appropriate, because this applies to job interviews as well.  If you don't relax then the person interviewing you can't relax, and the entire process can go badly.  You can lose your train of thought, answer questions incorrectly or not at all, and then not be hired.  Try to relax and like the movie "Frozen", just let it flow.

Make Eye Contact - I'm not certain about other cultures, but in the United States, eye contact is key in an interview.  She mentioned that the eyes are one of the most seductive parts of the body and that in order to be hired you must have good eye contact with your client.  If you are nervous and looking away, or staring off in a corner, this might turn a client off or make them fidgety.  It's no different in the business world where if you can't maintain good eye contact, you may not get the job. 

Tell Me About Yourself - The thing about being a call girl is they can make up anything they want about their history and none of it has to be true.  In fact this woman needed to create a false history to protect her identity but also to create a fantasy for the client. As an interview candidate you also must create a fantasy and identity for the job interviewer.  You want to be their ideal candidate, the one they want above all the rest, so you need to weave a good story about yourself and why you're the best person for the job.  You can do all this with the truth, as long as you share a compelling story.

Close For The Job - This was something she rarely had to do, but on occasion she would "push the clock", and remind clients that time was wasting and they might need to get the evening started.  She only did this if they were at a bar and the client was wasting her time and his, which I thought was a bit amusing.  I guess it's a business like any other, and keep in mind that she did have to close on occasion but if you're interviewing for a job you should always close for either a job offer or the next step in the process.  Often times the interviewer is waiting for you to do just that: be certain to close.

Follow Up - Okay she never sent any "Thank You" emails, flowers, or cards to her clients but she would follow up with her "recruiter" or madam to get some feedback on if they enjoyed her company.  I don't recommend that you send emails or cards asking if the hiring manager enjoyed your company, but do make sure to send a thank you card or email and share something you remembered from the interview.  This will seem more personal, and be sure to ask again for the position.


As I mentioned previously,  it was absolutely remarkable to hear how similar her experience was to what potential candidates go through during the interview process. I certainly hope these tips will help you in your efforts to be hired, and I found it absolutely fascinating that a person working the world's "oldest profession",  could offer sound advice to some of the newest members of the work force.  Good luck!

-M

11 Things Your Boss Should Want To Hear From You

The idea for this post came from an idiot....I mean an idiot besides myself.  Last week I read an article that listed things an employee should never say to their boss.  I was confused because as a boss, I encourage feedback from employees, both positive and negative.

I suppose all my posts are the direct result of me reading an article or book written by a so called expert, and then thinking:

"Is he/she serious?"

"Have they ever worked in a corporate environment? "

"Are they suffering from some sort of disease which affects their cognitive functions?"

But then I realized that the person who wrote the article worked in the entertainment industry, where there is a BIG DIFFERENCE from the corporate environment.  And that was why the article worked.   In the entertainment industry employees are sometimes terribly abused because there are thousands of people lining up behind them to take their job. And being open with your boss, in that type of work environment can get you fired almost immediately.  However for the rest of us whom work in a completely different world, have to abide by weird things like...oh I don't know, labor laws.   

There are good and bad bosses everywhere, even in entertainment, and at times there are things that your boss doesn't want to hear, but that you should tell her/him just to keep from being over worked or worse yet, brow beaten and abused.  Bosses need to learn their limits, just like employees,and I've listed below 25 things your boss should want to hear from you:

"No"-  I had a friend once advise me that saying "no" to your boss was tantamount to treason, and that it could get you fired immediately.  Well if your boss ask you for sex, are you going to say "no"?  Or are you going to say "Well it might be difficult for me to fit in sex today, but possibly tomorrow.  Is that okay?"  This is an extreme example, but if your boss asks you to work late and miss your first baby's ultrasound, than tell him "no".  Otherwise, he might expect you to work though your pregnancy, take an hour off to give birth, and then get back to work.  It's okay to say "no" especially when you're setting a precedent on the parameters of your working relationship.

"I don't know "- I say this all the time, not only to current customers, but to CEO's and CFO's.  Why?  Because I'm not going to lie and act like I know something when I don't.  I always follow it up with, "But if I can find an answer to that question/concern/issue, I will."   We don't know everything so why would profess too be all knowing?  I cannot profess to know everything, and a boss should never expect their employees to know everything.  Subsequently,  your boss should expect you at times to say, "I don't know."  Besides, if you were all knowing, then why would you be working for someone else anyway?  I'd take that all that knowledge and go to Vegas, or create an app that turns lead into gold.

I'll try - Oh this phrase used to infuriate me as a manager, because it sounds like an excuse for failure.  As if someone is setting you up to be let down, but in fact now I welcome it because it really is the employee telling you they lack the confidence to make a solid commitment.  Now, be careful here because if you ask them to start being on time for work, or to stop touching other employees inappropriately and they say, "I'll try", then you got some serious problems and a call to HR is appropriate.   However, if you ask them if they think they can get a presentation done by tomorrow and they say "I'll try"  this opens up the discussion as to why they may or may not be able to get it done.  Feedback here is good.

"How does this help me?"- Managers don't like to hear this uttered because it seems selfish, but it's the truth.  When managers talk about employees being team players there can be limits to being part of a team.  For example, if a sales person ventures into your territory and signs an account you were working on and your manager wants to give them credit, and not you. My first question would be, "WTF is he doing in my territory?", and my second question would be, "Is there a way for me to punch this other sales rep without being fired?", and my final question to my boss would be, "How does this help me?" If you are ever

"I did my best" - Once again this seems like an excuse for an employee not  to achieve a goal, but a manager should want to hear this because it opens up the room for discussion as to whether or not the employee's best effort is really enough to get the job done.  If it isn't then the manager needs to refocus on helping that employee achieve their goals so it helps both the employee feel better about themselves and the team.  Once again, do not tell your boss "I will do my best" if it comes to something basic like making time for a conference call, a meeting, or showing up for work.  That's pretty lame...

"Sorry, except...".- I have used this term and heard this term many times from partners and fellow employees.  It's usually followed by a reason why they haven't accomplished a task, and the except pertains to why they weren't able to accomplish this task.  I have used this as positive feedback to determine if an employee is overburdened with work and unable to do their job in a reasonable period of time.  Your boss should welcome this turn of phrase because again he/she is receiving feedback on why something didn't get done, an error the employee made which allows for training, or an opportunity to fire an employee who is a risk to keep employed.  Like one that says, "Sorry I burned down the plant, except you gave me a bad performance review."  No one wants to keep that type of employee.

"That's not my job..."-If you are forced to do something that is not in your job description, and is adding to your workload, you'd better tell your boss that it's not your job.  I have seen employees take on additional work that is not part of their job and then receive a poor performance review because they weren't will to say "that's not my job". This is especially true for employees who are extremely efficient.  Bosses will keep adding to their workload because they can rely on them, until they give them so much work that they can't be successful.  By the way, if you're not working as a personal assistant and your boss asks you to pick up his dry cleaning for him, you should tell him, "that's not my job", and it would be perfectly appropriate.  Personally, I would say something a little saltier like "____ off", but that's me.

I'm going to quit - First of all, your relationship with your boss should really never get to this point.  However if you have tried every mode of communication and they're still not hearing you, or trying to oblige with your requests, then it's perfectly fine to threaten to quit.  I had an employee who would threaten to quit every other month, but I knew that he was just trying to draw my attention to inefficient procedures in our processing plant.  It worked, because we fixed them, and he stopped making threats.  Now, did he have to go that extreme in order to get my attention, apparently he used this tactic in the past and it worked.  I used his veiled threats as a training lesson and just explained to him that it wasn't necessary to bring all the drama to the work place.  "Just tell me why your upset and let's work it out. "

"I assumed that..."- We are told never to assume because it makes ass out of you and me.  Well, if you make an assumption and you're wrong than that's not good, but it's not the end of the world.  If you're boss does not understand this than he's not very bright.  People are going to make assumptions, and mistakes. That's the "Facts Of Life", and I don't mean the old television show that appears in syndication.  It is human nature to make an assumption so your boss should not fault you for it.  Keep in mind if you make an assumption and you're right then he'll applaud you for it. 

"At (your old company), we would did it this way" - If your boss is so preoccupied with promoting the company culture that he/she can't listen to feedback about a competitor, that person is blind to any other way of doing things.  If someone ever comes to me with a more efficient way of doing something than I will reward that person, even if the idea came from a competitor.  As a boss, it is important to keep an open mind and an open door all the times.  Otherwise, you don't see the bigger picture.  However, this does not mean you should keep saying, "It was better at my old company" because then even your fellow employee will urge you to return, if it was so great.

It's not my fault...It was (insert random name here)- No one likes a person who points fingers at other employees.  Nobody likes a "rat". However, if you're about to lose your job because of someone else's mistake, I would be pointing 8 fingers at that person.  If I have a great employee, who is incorrectly blamed for a problem, I would want them to tell me who made the mistake.  It's not like you're Henry Hill and this is the movie "Good Fellas".  Yes, no one likes a "rat", but you have to stand up for yourself if no one else is going to do it for you.  If it's not your fault, then you need to say so, and this applies to employees only not managers.   The worst thing a manager can do is blame his subordinates.  Well, then he's not really a manager, he's just a jerk.

The employer and employee relationship are tantamount to the success of a business.  If your boss can't listen to feedback in a constructive way then he's not a good boss.  Please keep in mind it's all in the way you approach him, and how effectively you communicate your ideas.  Employees and employers must always keep an open mind and an open heart. 

Have a great day!

5 Reasons You Were "Let Go"

I've always hated the professional term "let go", which basically is a mild term for getting fired. It's sounds as if when a person is let go, the company is letting a bird out of a cage.  Can you imagine if Donald Trump said, "you're let go"?  First of all it would be confusing to the person, who would wonder where they were going, and secondly it wouldn't have the same emotional effect on the viewing audience as "you're fired!"  Why do companies make it sound like they're letting a zoo animal loose in the wild?

"You've been trapped so long in this dead end job that we are going to set you free! Run free! Run and be free!"

But that's really not what happens when you're let go, in fact the company never really lets you go because the stigma of being laid off or fired stays with you the rest of your life.  Not for a few weeks, but for the REST OF YOUR LIFE.  You think about it day and night and why it happened.  What did you do wrong or what did they do wrong?  Or "why did those bastards just let me go?" The term "let go" is just something people created to soften the blow but in reality it's a lie management tells themselves so they can sleep better at night. As a manager you never let someone go, you fire them.

However if you ever are let go, there are always alternatives but for some reason management doesn't see the need to pursue them, and that's pretty LAME.  If you were let go recently here are 5 very poor reasons why:

"We're restructuring our work force"- I could never figure this one out, especially when it happened to me years ago.  My manager was seriously upset that she had to fire me, but all I cared about was if I was getting any severance.  The conversation went something like this:

"I can't believe I have to do this.  I've never let someone go over something other than performance issues.  I'm so sorry.", she looked like she was about to cry.

"Well I know it's not performance because I'm at 144% to quota for the last 3 months and trending towards President's Club.", I said a little proud and a little bitter.  

"I know that's what makes this so hard.  We had to eliminate your territory, and we got rid of 10 reps across the country.  I'm so sorry."

"Well, you can't be too sorry, otherwise you wouldn't be letting me go. Hey at least they're not getting rid of Regional Managers.", I said, and then added, "Yet." and I started to laugh.

"How can you joke at a time like this.  I feel terrible.", she said again and I truly believe she was sad.

"What choice do I have?  I have to deal with it somehow. Besides, I'm a good rep.  I can find another job easily, and all I care about is if I get a severance package.  Do I get a severance package?"

"Yep 3 months.  What are you going to do?"

" I don't know this has never happened to me before.  Go find another job I guess.  Don't worry I'll be fine.  I've always wanted a 3 month vacation.", I said and smiled so she would feel better.

"I'll be sure to right you a letter of recommendation.  Since you are leading the region right now in sales it's the least I can do."

At this point what I should have said is, "The least you can do is fire the under performing reps and keep me!", but instead what I said was, "Thanks.  I appreciate it, and don't worry I'll be fine."  What a wimp! And what a terrible excuse for letting me go.  I found out later she fired me because she knew I was the strongest rep and would survive the lay off.  Uh...golly gee, thanks for the endorsement?

We Need To Cut Costs - I always find this reason for firing someone slightly amusing because if corporations really wanted to cut costs, and I mean CONSIDERABLY, shareholders should start demanding that CEO's and managers take substantial pay cuts.  It seems that they always cut the work force rather than their expense accounts or executive pay.  Once I was asked to fire 3 employees with over 30 years experience combined because "we needed to cut costs".  The conversation went something like this:

My new GM asked me, "We're behind on our profit numbers who can we cut to make that last 2%?"

"Are you serious?  You want to fire someone just so you can make a number?"

"Yes I want you to fire someone.  We can always hire them back in few months.  It's just a production partner anyway.  I can train anybody to do that job."

"Oh okay, so first of all, that's insulting to all our production partners and how does that makes it alright to sack someone?  Who do you suggest I fire?"

"Yolanda.  She's a pain in the butt and she makes the most money.  I think we should fire her and the other two supervisors.  We can make our numbers in last quarter if we do that."

"Yolanda!  My best employee and one of the best employees we have.  And the other two leads! The whole production team will fall apart. Sorry the answer is NO."

"You can't say NO to me! You're such a friggin cowboy you know that! If I don't make that number I may be out of a job, and you might be out of a job. Is that what you want?"

"No I don't want anyone to lose their job, including you.  I will restructure the work schedule to make up the 2% but I'm not firing anyone, and if we don't hit our number than fire my ass if you want to fire anyone.  I'm not a 40 year old production partner with 4 mouths to feed."

"I'm gonna hold you to that number cowboy.  You better come through.", he said with slight twang in his voice as he pointed his finger at me.  I just laughed, even thought inside my stomach was turning.

"I'll hit it.", as I said this, I wondered what to tell my wife I just said to my boss when I got home.  Uggh!

Needless to say I did hit the number, and there was no need to fire anyone.  If they tell you that you were let go because they are cutting costs, that could be total bulls**t.  If they want to really save money, executives should fire themselves, or take a pay cut.   

"Your Position Was Eliminated" - Okay, I just had a friend who was let go because they "eliminated" her position.  What the company did was move her position and change the title so a personal friend of the CEO's sister could be hired.  She was doing an outstanding job, but the CEO wanted his little friend to work with his sister, so they eliminated her position...politics.  

The same thing happened to a 15 year veteran and dear friend in the laundry business.  He was the consummate partner and the company decided after 15 years and LEADING THE COUNTRY IN GROWTH AND PROFIT, that they didn't need him anymore.  His branch was too small to need a manager so they eliminated his position, and didn't even offer him a different one.  You mean to tell me, they couldn't find a position for a guy who basically bled the company colors. WTF?

Eliminating your position means essentially your company is eliminating you.  If they really wanted to keep you on board, they would find another position for you.  Sad but true.

We're Downsizing - I have many friends who have been laid off for exactly this reason.  In fact,  a friend who worked for a division of Johnson and Johnson described her experience of being let go right in the middle of a regional meeting. 

She was sitting in the meeting with a bunch of other reps when an HR person for the company came in and grabbed her, and told her to pick up her things.  How embarrassing first of all, and secondly, they couldn't wait until the meeting was over to let her go?!!!  She was made to feel like she did something wrong, which she didn't, and it made her look bad in front of her peers.  She said she would never get over the emotional scars it left on her, and it would take years for them "heal". 

Lay offs like this occur in medical sales all the time, but it's because healthcare companies often over saturate a market with reps, especially when they're promoting a new device or a drug, and when they don't meet projections, they start firing reps.   Unfortunately it's common place in healthcare sales, but it doesn't need to be, if the product is marketed correctly and forecasting is done right.  I know that Blitzkrieg marketing works but at the expense of people's jobs and their lives?  Branding can be done in other ways rather than throwing money and sale reps at the issue.

If companies really want to avoid downsizing they should not over extend themselves....but that will never happen. 

We're Outsourcing Your Department Overseas - I heard from a friend they were eliminating her department at her company and outsourcing it to somewhere in Asia.  I thought to myself, that's just another way to cut costs, but not necessarily improve efficiency or customer retention. It's a tiny bandage on a large wound.  I think that corporations see cheap labor as an easy alternative to help cut costs and so they take the easy route.  But what do they do when wages in that new country increase? Outsource the jobs to another, cheaper country?  They need to look internally at their own corporate overhead.  CEO's spend more time focusing on cheap labor rather than expensive corporate overhead, especially in America where CEO's are paid on average more any other country in the world.  There are disputes over how much more, but the United States still has the best paid executives worldwide.   If executives wanted to save money and reduce redundancies than might want to consider lowering executive compensation across the board in order to keep US citizens employed.  It's good for the economy and it's good for business...but not good for executives, and so that will never happen.

If you are ever laid off there are a few things you need to remember that I will cover in a companion post to this one:

1. It's not your fault
2. It's not your fault
3. It's not your fault

Now these are just a few reasons why you were "let go", but there are many more, and sometimes the people in charge really have no choice.  The company might be losing money and jobs need to be cut in order to keep the business afloat.  However, as a former corporate employee and corporate manager,  I only urge that people in the "C" suite look at all the alternatives before making the decision to lay people off.   Remember that 40 million families are living paycheck to paycheck...now sleep on that.

-M

7 Reasons Why You Might Want To Hire The Food Truck Guy

Copyright: jewhyte / 123RF Stock Photo

 

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...namely Pico Rivera.  I ran into probably the greatest food truck guy I ever met in my life, and I mean EVER!  Forget all those fancy food trucks touting gourmet food, this was long before that craze.  It was back when there were no gourmet trucks, just food trucks that would visit your business at breaks and lunch and serve food.  It wasn't exactly gourmet and I'm not sure it was even edible, but we didn't buy the food because it was good, we bought it because of the guy selling it: Roy.

 

And who was Roy?  Roy was the guy running the food truck with two cooks, and he was really the face of his company.  He was phenomenal, and he made it a point to remember every one's name, what food they liked, how it was cooked, where they lived, how many kids they had, and perhaps even their blood type.  Please keep in mind over 250 people worked at this place. The guy was very sociable, incredibly nice, and just one of the best people I had ever met.  So when one of my fellow Service Managers came to me and asked me to interview Roy for a service position, I thought I at least owed him an interview since he knew I liked my hamburger with Swiss cheese and not the cheap stuff. And that I liked it medium well, not medium rare.  

 

I asked the Service Manager, "Does he know he needs to wear a suit?"

 

He responded, "He will now.", and so the interview was set.

 

Back then I was a real hard ass dealing with people in interviews, and when I interviewed a candidate, it seemed like I was trying to find a way to turn them down, rather than hire them.  I was very quiet, and didn't share much to see if I would make them nervous, or better yet, I could get them to open up and tell me more about themselves, so that I could judge them inappropriately and then reject them.  I was a jerk.  However this was the process I was taught in interviews, to weed out people, and let only "the strong survive".  I was such an arrogant idiot! 

 

Roy came into the interview dressed very well, better than me in fact, and he sat calmly in his chair and answered every question I had for him regarding sales, service, employee relations, and especially teamwork.  The interview changed his life, but it also changed mine as well.  I grilled him, no pun intended, for almost two hours and it seemed every answer he had was perfect.  It was frustrating at first, because of course I was trying to dismiss him as a candidate, but then I started to realize that this person sitting in front of me was the type of employee I had wanted to work with my entire career. 

 

Listed below are the reasons I hired him and the same reasons as a manager you should consider people who don't necessarily have the credentials for the position, but have the character to be successful and help you in the process.  Listed below are the qualities I found in Roy, but that you might find in any person, and allow you to fill ANY POSITION.

 

Punctuality - One thing you can be sure of when hiring a food truck person is that you can be assured they will be punctual.  In fact, they'll probably be ten minutes early for every meeting, appointment, or event.  These people run on a set schedule because they have to and if they're ever late, they don't make any money.  If the job requirement if for someone who can set your watch to, then this is a great person for the job. I think Roy was a sun dial in a previous life because he could tell me what time it was just by looking at the sky.  At times, it was a bit disturbing.

 

Entrepreneurial - People who run a food truck or maybe multiple trucks are "hustlers".  They are looking for ways to make money because that's how they pay themselves.  Not all of them own the truck they're operating so the more money they make for the company, the more money them make for themselves.  Moreover, the food truck industry is a very competitive market so they're always trying to differentiate themselves from the competition.  They think of various ways to separate themselves from other trucks by offering different varieties of foods, doing special events, or sponsoring  charitable events.  They'll do anything to gain an edge and they will bring that same enthusiasm to their new job.

 

Great Work Ethic - I did not even have an open position for Roy, but I hired him anyway.  I took a lot of grief for making this decision, but it turned out to be the right one.  He was absolutely the hardest working person I had ever met.  He worked long hours without overtime, just to make sure the job was done perfectly, and that his customers all appreciated our company.  He would go out of his way to work on weekends just make sure he felt comfortable with all his existing customer relationships, and it finally got to a point where I told him, "Hey ET!  Don't phone home, just go home!"

 

Dedication - To stand out from other food trucks you have to offer either great food or great service.  Roy had pretty good food but he offered incredible customer service.  If you liked something on your burger, taco, burrito, or even fries he would get it.  No matter how stupid it might seem, he would go out of his way to make sure the customer was happy.  He applied the same great service when I hired him.  I remember him asking me if he could come in on a Sunday to get some temporary garments for a customer who needed them on Monday morning.  He advised he would press them and have them ready and I didn't need to do anything, he would handle it.  He did and that dedication transferred to his treatment of me.  He was extremely loyal. So loyal, that when I left the company he felt almost betrayed.  I advised him that it's not the company that makes him great, he's the one that makes the company great.  It was the truth.

 

Honesty - Apparently, in speaking with Roy not all operators of food trucks were very honest.  Many of them would "skim" money off the top, by charging some customers more for food than others and keeping the profit for themselves.  I do remember that prices weren't often listed so it depended on the truck operator to determine pricing.  With other operators I remembered the pricing could vary by item by day. However Roy was honest to a fault and always honored whatever pricing was listed or communicated.  He never changed the pricing and if he did he always advised the customer of the change. There were no surprises.  Which is how you want all your employees to conduct themselves.  Right?

 

They Care - When you're hiring an employee you want them to truly care about themselves, their families, their jobs, and their customers.  You don't want someone who doesn't give a damn about anything.  You want them motivated and invested in their future and the company as well.  I can remember Roy coming to me and asking if he could take flowers to a customer who's grandmother had died.  I told him that was very thoughtful and I'm sure she would appreciate the sentiment.  He said, "When someone is in pain, they sometimes need to be reminded that there is good in the world." Now, I'm a cold heartless bastard but Roy had me tearing up that day.  Hire someone who cares about people.

 

Self Motivated - These people want to win! You don't have to push them to be successful.  They'll probably be the ones pushing you to achieve more. They won't be happy with an entry level position either, which is just the type of employee you want to work with in any environment.  I remember having an issue with a new hire, so I decided to make Roy a trainer and after 3 weeks with the new employee he came to me with some sound advice.

"This guy's not gonna make it.  I have to call him every morning to come in because while I'm loading the truck, he's still in bed. I like him but he's not motivated.  Great guy but if I have to call him to come in and work, then pretty soon you're going to have to call him to come in and work. You don't want that.  I don't think he fits with the team. "

Only 6 months into the job and already Roy was looking out for me and the team.  And it didn't stop there.  After a year, Roy asked what it took to be a manager, I told him a college degree was a prerequisite, so he went out and earned one.  He was self motivated and wanted to succeed and we helped enable him to be successful.   He went on to have a long and promising career and is currently a Regional Trainer with a pretty large organization.  He always felt the need to achieve.


So if you're a manager and you're looking through a stack of resumes, don't discount the candidates who don't look so great on paper.  You might find that one in a million employee that you just can't pass up.  I know I did, and it changed the way I looked at hiring people from that point forward.
Remember, you can't find a needle in a haystack if you're not even looking. 

Have a great day selling!

 

 

 

20 Different Ways To Say "You're Fired"

Being fired is not pleasant, in fact it is completely demoralizing. I've been fired on 2 occasions and those experiences have been imbedded in my brain. However, managers in an effort to try and soften the blow have come up with so many different ways to say, "You're fired", that it's often times confusing to the employee. I'm certain they word it a certain way to make themselves feel better, but it's still the same...you're out of a job.

Here are 20 different ways to say "you're fired". Some are subtle and some are downright cruel:

We're Letting You Go - My personal favorite because where the hell is the employee going at this point? The answer is nowhere except to the unemployment line. "Hey boss you wanna come with me?" Unfortunately I'm not sure there's a better term to use, but if you're a manager and you're creative, you'll think of one.

We're Going To Allow You To Pursue Other Career Opportunities - When I heard someone got fired this way, I almost laughed. But that would have been rude to the person who just got fired, just like it's rude to try and "candy coat" the fact that you're out of a job. "Thanks boss for thinking of me! I'll be sure to send you a card from prison, because I'm going to have to rob a liquor store just to pay the rent."

We're Going To End Our Relationship At This Time - As a manager, I've used this one before and it's so vague. The employee thinks that you're breaking up with them. I used it once and never again, because it just confuses people. They're thinking, "I didn't know we had a relationship?" Plus they're expecting a farewell dinner, candy, or lunch as well.

We Think You'd Be Our Best Asset, If You Worked For Our Competition - Oh yes, this one is positively absurd, but one that a vindictive manager once said to his employee. When the employee questioned him, he added, "You're fired." This one isn't even mildly subtle. It's rude, and it could get you fired if you're a manager. Don't be mean even if the employee is an a**hole.

We Feel You'd Be A Better Fit At A Different Company - Another funny one because the employee is wondering, "Which Company? Do you have any recommendations? Am I being traded? Is this the NFL?" It's a weird way of saying "LEAVE NOW PLEASE".

We're Eliminating Your Position - Recently a friend went through this and it turned out to be a political move on the CEO's part. It wasn't that they were eliminating the position, they were just changing the title and eliminating her. Ouch! Personally, I hope she sues the company.

We're Downsizing - Unfortunately this happened a lot during the recent recession, and I feel sorry for all the people who were fired. In this instance it wasn't their fault, and maybe the executives who are doing the downsizing should consider a pay cut instead of having to cut the workforce...but that'll never happen.

Dude! You Suck At This Job! - You may laugh, but at my first job, that's exactly what my manager said to me. Now he was a kid and I was a kid, but he was still a manager. He was in the process of firing me, when his boss came in and they moved me to a different department where I did great. Lucky for him and me because later he worked for me.

We're Cutting Costs - I never understood this reason for firing people, because if you can't manage other costs besides labor, then maybe you shouldn't be a manager. Personally, a lot of people are unemployed because their company couldn't manager the other costs besides labor. If shareholders want to cut costs, they should cut executive pay, and make it more performance based. All bets are off here in a recession because a that point, everyone is suffering.

This Isn't Working Out - Again, this sounds like another dating break up. But this is one I've used many times because it's the truth, and at this point even the employee knows it's not working out. Don't belabor the fact, just cut right to the chase and let them know they've been terminated.

You Slept With Your Employee So...- I remember being in a room, when this went down one time and it was very awkward. Apparently, the manager was sleeping with his rep, and it was consensual but the other reps heard about it and BAM. He was fired.

We Feel You'd Be Happier Some Place Else - I always get a chuckle from this one. It sounds like the company just has your best interests at heart. They are looking out for your happiness. Heck, maybe they'll even have Deepak Chopra stop by your house...after you've signed all your termination papers. "Hey thanks guys for the encouragement!"

You Stole From Us So...- I can't remember how many times I had to terminate an employee over this issue. Seemingly great people, who some how thought they would never be caught stealing. I had one guy deny stealing and was screaming in the office, when we showed him a surveillance video, and then he was as quiet as a church mouse.

You're Just Not Catching On - I don't know if this one is confusing to you, but it is to me. "What am I not catching on to? Could you be more specific?" I have been in a room where someone said this and the person just looked befuddled. She asked, "Catching on? Catching on to what?" It's hard to word it differently but maybe you should just stick to the facts like, "You're not meeting the standards set for this position." There's a good chance the employee already knows that fact, so there will be no surprises.

We Feel This Job Isn't Right For You - I'm not so sure I would use this one if I ever had to terminate someone again, because it gives them the opportunity to ask, "Well which job here would be right for me?" It's better to be honest because if you did have a job that was right for them you would have offered it already. Correct? Just tell them that it's over.

We're Going To Part Ways - This makes it sound like you are two weary travelers on the road to Canterbury and you've come to a fork in the road, and you're letting them take the one less traveled by. Not cool, just tell them the position is not for them, and end it.

You Don't Fit Our Culture - I was surprised when I heard this one time from a VP at a very prominent company. I understand that culture is important, but you can't fire somebody just because they aren't a culture fit. What culture anyway? Are we Bushmen of The Kalahari Desert? It's best to stick with the facts and not insult the person, even if they aren't a culture fit.

We've Decided To Make A Change - I have heard this used A LOT. I still don't know what it means, and it's very non specific. I believe it's just a lead in to the actual termination, but if you hear this phrase from your boss, then you know what's coming next, and it's not good.

We're Restructuring Our Work Force - I was on the short end of this stick years ago, and it wasn't fun. I didn't understand what they meant by restructuring, but it meant getting rid of me. Which didn't make sense because as a rep, I was number 1 in the region for the last 3 months. I thought, "Couldn't we restructure the work force with me in it?" It turned out to be all about geography and coverage and so I was out.

Security! - If you've ever been in this situation, it is not pretty. Many employees don't like the fact they are being fired. Imagine that! They aren't happy when they've been terminated, and so the manager screams out "Security!", much like Bon Qui Qui from the famous MAD tv skit. As a manager, as an employee, don't ever let your working relationship get to this point, because it's not worth it.

Simply put, there really is no easy way to tell anyone "you're fired". As an employee who hears those words, the best thing for you to do is learn from the experience, TRY NOT TO TAKE IT PERSONALLY, and find a job that's right for you. As a manager, you should do every thing you can to avoid having to fire someone, but if you have to, make sure it's not a surprise to the employee, and they leave with their dignity in tact.

Here's to hoping you never have to hear, or say the words, "you're fired!"...unless you're Donald Trump.