I know a lot of people who have children, but fortunately or unfortunately, depending on how I'm feeling on any particular day, I don't have any kids of my own. However, this does not keep me from being inundated with baby talk, kid talk, preschool issues, and parenting guidelines. I receive all kinds of advice from people about child rearing despite the fact that I have no children, which makes me wonder if they want me to have kids, or they think I act like a child. I'm often not sure how to respond when they proffer advice but I usually just say, "I miss the days when children were allowed to work in factories", or "I try to pattern my life after Freddy Krueger's so having children is probably not a good idea for me." Usually the advice stream stops at that point in the conversation.
The other day, while at a hospital one of the nurses was showing a video of her child doing a puzzle and the kid must have been about two or three years old. I have 12 nieces and nephews so I am pretty good at guessing the age of a child. I must admit, I was pretty amazed at the dexterity with which the child put this rather detailed jigsaw puzzle together. A puzzle which I am sure would have taken me days to complete, if I even had the determination to try. I usually give up on any problem after 30 minutes of intense frustration.
I was so impressed, I blurted out, "Wow is he a savant?"
"Oh god no. He's a genius." and she said this very matter of fact, as if it was a given, that her boy would be a genius. She smiled and added, "Look at how fast he put the pieces in place. You know he's reading already."
I was inspired or perturbed to inquire further, I made the comment, "Shakespeare? Milton? Tina Fey?"
"Very funny smart ass. No just basic stuff but he tests at a genius level."
" They have tests for kids that age to see if they're a genius?"
" Well yes and no. You can have them take an IQ test if you think they can handle it but they do offer various little tests to check your child's IQ."
" Are you going to have him tested?"
" No need. I already know he's a genius. My grandfather was a genius so I'm sure he is too."
" I didn't know your grandfather was a genius! Wow! That's amazing. Who is he anyway?"
At this juncture in the conversation, I was really excited to learn who her grandfather was...Thomas Edison, Jonas Salk, or maybe even Albert Einstein.
"Oh, he wasn't anyone who's famous. He was just really, really, smart. He was an inventor."
" No kidding. That's fascinating. What did he invent?"
" Well nothing you would hear of today. Just a bunch of stuff. The electronic oven mitt was one invention of his? Have you ever heard of it?"
I had never heard it, subsequently I shook my head. She understood...maybe she was a genius too.
"It didn't work because the cord was too long. But my little boy is going to be just as smart."
I didn't want to be too rude, so I nodded in agreement, "It looks like he's already on his way."
"Yep, he's a little genius. In fact, he's been doing Baby Einstein since before he was born. And he watches Baby Genius on YouTube all the time."
I chuckled, thinking she was joking. "How could he understand Baby Einstein in the womb? Is that even possible?"
She laughed, "You dope, it's just music like Mozart and Bach. It helps soothe the baby."
"Oh, okay. Well all this talk of genius is just making me feel dumb. Maybe I should listen to Mozart."
"I don't think it would help you. You have to be born a genius like Chandler."
Before I could blurt out anything sarcastic like, "You named your kid after a character on 'Friends'?", or "just because you can sing about apples and bananas in different languages doesn't make you smart", I took my leave and headed out of the hospital. But I kept thinking that her requirements for the label of "genius" were pretty low. I mean, just because your kid is good at puzzles, can read at kindergarten level, and his great grandfather was the inventor of the electronic oven mitt, doesn't mean he's a freaking genius. And then I kept wondering about the electronic oven mitt, and why it would need a cord. It's an oven mitt!
I went about my normal workday and this word "genius" kept coming up in conversation. I was in a Physical Therapy clinic and a Lil Wayne song was playing on some one's radio and I heard one of the therapists say, "This song is genius!" I mean, I like Lil Wayne, but I never thought I word hear his name and the word genius in the same sentence. The word "crunk" maybe but not "genius".
Later, at lunchtime, I was eating and a song from the band Mumford and Sons was being piped in over a sound system. I heard one waitress say to another, "Oh I love this song! These guys are total geniuses! Have you ever seen them live? They....are....awesome!" Once again, I didn't necessarily agree with the moniker of "geniuses" to describe a group of people who could play washboards and banjos. I decided to tell the young lady she was entirely wrong in her speaking of her favorite band in terms of pure intellect.
As the waitress approached my table, I meant to say, "The definition of genius is a person who has an exceptionally high intelligence quotient, typically above a 140 IQ. ", but instead I said, "I thought only people who were mentally retarded played the banjo."
"What?" was her response. As if she didn't hear or more importantly, didn't understand what I said.
" Nothing. Can I have the check?", I said acting as if nothing had happened.
" Sure. I guess.", she answered, and she walked off mumbling something under her breath. I thought it was, "Who doesn't like Mumford and Sons?"
As the day progressed, I heard the word genius used to describe everything from a coffee barista to an actual cup of coffee. And I realized, it isn't the term that has changed, but rather our definition. We have significantly lowered the standards in the "genius" category. Consequently, the term has now taken on the form of an noun, adjective, and adverb. No longer is it a honor to be called a genius, but it is rather commonplace. So if you come up with a brilliant or creative idea and someone calls you a "genius", they might as well just call your name out at a Starbucks. What's the difference?
Have a genius day!
-M
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