Professional Jealousy

We all go through this , although none of us will admit to it. You have a friend, in sales, in service, in management, in whatever... You both have the same type of job, but suddenly they're having a great year and you're doing okay, but you're not #1. This sucks! Especially if you're used to being ahead of that person year after year. And more specifically if you're a competitive person, this is especially painful. Here' a tip though...let it go.

You can't always win, I'm sorry. And if you think you can, then you're dead wrong, it's an impossibility. Teams, people, they invariably lose at some point. So just accept the fact that you may not be the best every single day, but you're in it for the long haul. And be careful what you wish for because it may not always be the best thing for you.

Years and years and years ago, I was doing very well with a company running a team of 12 people and we were kicking ass! I was young, on the fast track, and my friend was on his way out. He was cantankerous, had no college degree, and really no future, because he fought with management all the time. Now keep in mind, he was a smart guy, and right most of the time, but he couldn't get over the "college degree" hurdle. I told him, "Go at night and get one. Any idiot can earn a degree. Look at me! I have two!"(This is true by the way)

So he did get his college degree. Pretty soon he was in a management role and quickly he rose in the company to a General Manager. Sooner than me! I was pissed...I complained about it to my wife, "Why did I tell him to get that degree? That bastard got the job I wanted! I hate him. " Just basically whining all the way to number 1 in the region but still mad I wasn't promoted before him. I had the numbers to support it, but people don't always look at the numbers. So there I was, jealous, angry, and bitter at my friend for getting promoted before me. Why? Because I thought he had what I wanted...and then we had a little chat at lunch.

"Damn Bill, I can't believe you're a GM now. You're making all the cash. It must be great!" (You little bastard you stole my job even though your numbers are worse. This is bullshit)

" You'd think so huh. But I bet I make only $10 hour based on how much I work, and I'm always at the office. My wife hates me, my kids hate me. It's not all it's cracked up to be. I never see my family."

"Really? Why don't you delegate all that work. Take it easy! You're the boss remember?" (He's saying this to make me feel better. Patronizing me...bastard)

"It's a lot of responsibility. I can't sleep some nights wondering if I'll get fired. There's too much to control...it's hard. And you can't delegate everything because some people just don't perform the way you want to all the time."

"That doesn't sound so great now that I think about it. And to think, I wanted that job." (Maybe he's being sincere, this doesn't sound so great. He's still a bastard though)

"Yeah well you can have it...and the stomach pains I've been getting because of it. It's not that great being a manager dude. Stay where you're at. It's better."

"Thanks for the advice. Maybe I will." (He's bullshitting me)

Of course I didn't listen to him, and soon I was promoted and we were suffering together in the same GM role, working our butts off, for little or no thanks. We were both doing well, and I wasn't jealous at all. I knew he was going through the same crap I was, and he had a family to worry about. I let it go, and I didn't have any ulcers, no sleepless nights, none of that. Cause I only focused on what I could control. The jealousy was gone and soon so was Bill. They "eliminated" his position. He was number 1 in the country in growth and they downsized him out. Thank you! Big mistake...he went on to be the VP at their competition, and kicked their butts!

If you have a friend, a partner, or anyone who's doing well give them a pat on the back. Keep in mind those accolades don't always last that long, and don't get jealous, don't get angry, just go make money and be happy with what you have. Focus only on what you can control and the rest will take care of itself.


-M
-M

Weekly Quotes from Nick Handy

ATTITUDE: The greatest discovery of any sales manager, is that if a sales person is producing they have a good attitude and if they're not, they have a bad attitude and need to be fired.

LinkedIn

I don't know how many of you are on this site, but it's a great resource for jobs, people you worked with and lost touch with, and to see what's going on in the market place. I've been on here for a few years now and I don't visit this site as often as I do my Facebook page, but then again who does? If you're looking to network online in the business world, or find a job, this is a wonderful site with a few exceptions:

1.)Requests from people you never liked: I still get request to get connected to people who are complete assholes. The type of people that if they could do anything to gain an advantage, even if it's unethical, they will do it. The kind of person whom everyone knows is an asshole but still gets ahead. When I get these requests I cringe and then ignore them. Those people are now someone else's problem not mine.

2.) Connect with a boss you hated: Isn't it funny how horrible bosses have no clue how bad they are and try to reconnect with you later on. I remember after I transferred to a new company, mainly because my general manager was a complete idiot, that same manager tried to connect with me on LinkedIn to come back and work for him. When I said to him, "I think I f#$king quit" wasn't that a clue that I didn't want to work with him anymore? How stupid can a person be? And what's ironic is that same boss sent his resume, after he was fired, to my new company and cited me as a reference. And his resume was filled with spelling errors! Yeah I wanna hitch my wagon to that train.

3.) Get messages from people in countries/cities you've never heard of: I understand the market place has gone international but that's really in relation to the computer industry and the tech market place, not necessarily medical devices. I will get random messages to connect with people in Latvia and Sri Lanka to Kuala Lumpur. People who will assist with my Internet marketing. I have no idea if they can help and I don't want to establish an online connection if I can't actually meet the person. I'm "old school" like that...I wanna see who I'm working with.

4. Receive random solicitations from old colleagues looking for jobs: I always feel bad when I get these messages because there's often not a lot I can do for the person. I don't work as a manager anymore, and chances are if I did, I would have contacted them already. Nowadays, with many people having a difficult time, I feel for the people who are out of work, and even worse because I can't help them. These connections just depress me.

5.) Random messages from people in companies that have obviously taken your online data from some place and are direct marketing you:  I'm not sure you're aware but all of your online cookies transaction, or just about anything you do online is available to THOUSANDS OF COMPANIES! This is no joke. If you think you're information is secure, you're kidding yourself. I received a Viagra message from some rep working at a medical supply company. I don't need Viagra, but I guess they thought for some reason I could use a prescription.  Thanks for the encouragement?
I am serious about the information exchanges...your information is shared every time you visit a site. It's kind of frightening.

So even if you have a job or don't have a job, check out LinkedIn and reconnect with old colleagues, get annoyed with people you don't want to connect with, look for jobs you want, and enjoy the endless trail of messages from people trying to get you to buy Viagra. Have a good day selling.

-M